How to control self-doubt and step fully into Your Purpose

We all experience feelings of self-doubt from time to time, whether we’re about to make a life-changing choice, start a new job, or take a test. It’s perfectly normal, and even the most confident people have moments where that inner voice raises self-doubt. So, you’re not alone; it is just that some people experience it more than others.

So, self-doubt is experiencing feelings of uncertainty about one or more aspects of yourself. A certain low level of self-criticism can be a positive source of motivation to inspire you to work harder and hone your skills to increase your confidence. But left unchecked, such doubt and fear can hold you back from opportunities, relationships, and experiences meant to help you grow; instead, preventing you from performing well and reaching your full potential.

But self-doubt is a mindset, and like any mindset, it can be shifted, and you can break free!

Understanding Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is a lack of confidence in yourself and your abilities. It’s a mindset that holds you back from success and belief. Many things can cause a person to doubt themselves, and while it can be helpful to understand the underlying causes, learning how to work around your self-doubt is more useful.

Self-doubt is often rooted in:

• Past experiences or perceived failures
• Fear of judgment or criticism (by others and yourself)
• Comparison with others and fear of failure and success
• Unclear sense of purpose or direction

It is best to think of these as possible explanations for your self-doubt and use them to help you stop beating yourself up. When you understand where your self-doubt may have come from, you can begin to address it. FEAR is often what is holding you back; fear of failure, loss, change, being judged, success, the unknown, loneliness, rejection, not being good enough… I don’t think I need to go on.

Types of self-doubt

Self-doubt often manifests in three forms, all of which erode your self-esteem over time, and the negativity with which you view yourself increases.

1. Imposter syndrome or the illogical fear of others seeing you as a fraud or undeserving of your accomplishments.
2. Self-sabotage, when you undermine yourself, your values, and your goals.
3. Indecisiveness, or struggling to make big and small decisions due to worries that whatever path you choose will be wrong.

Signs that you’re doubting yourself

Here are four common indicators of self-doubt in your personal or professional life:

1. You struggle to accept compliments from others, and you can’t give yourself credit for successes.
2. You constantly seek reassurance from others.
3. You have low self-esteem.
4. You feel like you’re never good enough, and constantly compare yourself to others you consider better/more successful.

Ways to control Self-Doubt

Here are some good habits that you could try to keep in mind to stop the self-doubt from sneaking up on you:

1. Remember, you are your biggest critic
   Acknowledge any negative self-talk without identifying with it. You hold yourself to a higher standard than anyone else does. Apologising to yourself is one of the most important steps toward healing and moving forward.
2. Reframe the narrative
   When faced with a challenge and that nagging self-doubt, instead of asking, “What if I fail?” try, “What if I succeed?” So, be sceptical of your thoughts. Question how helpful they are. Negative thinking is a mental habit that can be undone with patience and commitment.
3. Acknowledge past achievements
   Self-reflection is a fantastic tool to remind you of what you are capable of. It is important to learn from what’s happened, not dwell on the bad, and focus on lessons learned.
4. Reconnect with your Purpose
   Having a strong sense of ‘why’ will carry you through the moments of insecurity. Your Soul Purpose is bigger than your fear.
5. Practice self-compassion
   Self-doubt means that you’re holding yourself back. It arises from the fear of making a mistake, but these mistakes are how we grow and better ourselves. Saying positive affirmations, and also what you are thankful for, at the start of the day can be helpful.
6. Don’t compare yourself with others
   It is important not to compare yourself with a family member, friend, colleague, or even a celebrity. Everyone’s life is different, and someone else excelling in something that you are not doesn’t mean you don’t have other strengths. Instead, focus on yourself, as it’s one of the best ways to accomplish your dreams.
7. Take small, courageous steps
   Believe me when I say that confidence grows through action, not perfection. Celebrate any progress that you make, however small.
8. Surround yourself with support
   Seek out people, environments, and mentors that remind you of your worth and potential. Some people won’t support you, and being around such people and their negativity is bad for your mental health. Spend your time with people who make you feel good, build you up when you’re struggling, and encourage you.

Then, please remember it’s okay to seek professional help, especially if self-doubt is a persistent obstacle. Talking about your feelings and insecurities will help you unburden yourself.

How I can help as your Soul Purpose Mentor…

As a Soul Purpose Mentor and Coach, I am here to help you identify the deeper truths that self-doubt is trying to hide. Together, we will:

• Uncover your unique purpose and gifts so you have a clear sense of direction
• Develop tools and strategies to quiet the inner critic
• Build your confidence to take action towards the life you’re meant to live
• Create an ongoing connection to your intuition so you can trust yourself fully.

When you’re aligned with your Soul Purpose, self-doubt loses its power because you’re no longer measuring yourself against someone else’s path. You’re walking your own.

Visit soulpurposementor.co.uk to learn more about working with me, or book a clarity session today.